Inky starry night, in arms of torment
I stay awake
Biting back drops of insolent tears
I search for you a million times
In my memory
Hoping to find the answers
Hoping to find your promise of return
But, you had made none!
On evenings cold, I walk alone
On the same paths
Retracing our steps
Where you had kissed me deep
Hoping to see you at the next turn
By the river, I sit and wait
Watching the ferry go
I remember your last words
‘Sorry babe, but Dad said No’
As I stare at our only photo
You were never there
It was only me
The love, the yearning, the agony.
With one final wipe of tear
I know with time this numbness will wane
But, for now, let me mourn.
Please Note: This poem was written ages ago, sometime back in 2006. Found it tucked into the pages of one of my old diaries, gave it minor edits before posting.
This is dedicated to my first crush from school who turned into love in my twenties and then an ex-love. (It’s a story in itself, will write it someday for sure, for now let it be only this poem).